Expectations

Everyone has them. Nobody can get rid of them. They're everywhere, lurking around the corner like that creepy guy in the library.  

I'm talking expectations. 

So what do we do with them? If you're anything like me, you write a list of all the things you want to achieve in the next five years and it goes: I want this, want this, want this, want this...

And by the end of it, I feel so much damn pressure on myself that I end up in a fit of tears and I feel like I'm going nowhere and I've suddenly grabbed the Malibu from my bedside table while my cat looks at me nervously from the floor. 

Let's just say I'm overwhelmed. I'm confused. I'm not sure if I'm going in the right direction or doing the right things or hanging out with the right people or have the right hair. 

It drives me nuts. It takes me to a whole different place that I wish I could get away from. 

But you know what? I have a favourite word: perspective. 

That's exactly what I need. A good old heaping bucket of perspective. I need to take the things I'm thinking and just flip them over, stretch them out, and re-evaluate. 

Here's what I've come up with. I can't predict where I'm going to be in five years. I just can't. All I can do now is study hard, put my name in the hat for every opportunity, never allow myself to think i'm not good enough, and live my fucking life in the meantime. 

Because y'know what? It's too damn short. Nobody cares about your third anthropology essay when you're six feet under. 

So forget about whatever expectations you have and enjoy. Enjoy your friends, your books, your bed, whatever. It's not worth losing the moment by looking too far ahead. 

Laura