What Do I Do With My Life?
Oh, the ever-important question. What do I do with my life? What do I do with it? What is practical? What's going to make me the most money?
There's this pressure that sits on the shoulders of almost every one I meet who's around my age. It's that fresh out of college stress wave that hits you like a brick and you're up to your ears in worry wayyyyy before you graduate.
When I talk to my friends and I ask them what careers they want to pursue after they get their degrees, 99% of them say they don't know. Yet, if I tell anyone i'm thinking of taking some time off to dabble in a career in the arts, I get scoffed at. There are all these people around me getting degrees in broad things like math and bio and psychology and they laugh at me when I have a real plan and direction I would like to take. Why is this?!
Here's what I think: It could be a few things. One, competition among my generation is absolutely fierce. Every single person wants to outdo the other, wants to achieve more than the other. We're constantly compared to each other on social media, constantly trying to be more and do more, but it's really unhealthy. I need a break from this environment of constant competition and comparison that I find at school. It's sometimes too much for me.
Second, I think some people envy for truly wanting me to follow my dreams. They have gne ahead and done what the majority do: what's expected of them. What's "practical" (though in my opinion that's subjective). They might have a flicker of some crazy idea flit across their mind but it is quickly quelled by the prospect of money or judgement or failure. Doing the safe thing is often seen as better, smarter.
Last, I think people don't understand me. I've sent three years of my life pursuing something great that could really contribute to my life- why would I stop now? Well, the answer is I don't want to stop. I know I'll get my degree one day; this is not an issue. This is not an option. However, at the same time I don't see the problem with being flexible. Maybe I can finish it online or in another city. All I know for sure is that I am feeling called to change my direction in life and I need to follow that. The more you feed that motor that is your intuition, the more you listen to it, the louder it gets.
I am a child of my own path. I always have been. Part of me wants to stray from the norm to show others that it's okay, that it's doable. At the same time, there is a reason they call the less practical road the road less traveled. That's because it's hard. Following your dreams is hard. It takes risk and it takes thick skin and it takes the ability to tune out whatever is tuning into your insecurities, whatever is criticizing you. Your ability to succeed is entirely dependent on your own confidence. Don't act as if what you want to happen is going to happen one day at some point which you can't really see. You have it all inside of you. You just need to stop being afraid.
Stop being practical. Stop being afraid.
You only live one time. Stop taking it so seriously.